five!!!!!!!!

Week five....I really cannot believe I am half way through my stay here. I swear the time goes more quickly here than in England...okay...so I don’t want to think about going home...I’ll think about it tomorrow...(HAHAHA!!) dons...déjà... spent most of it in the studio typing up last weeks blog and writing emails pour people. Met Chris for late afternoon...had half of our dinner, (cause it took too long to cook), and then met Mary, Liz, Hannah, Max, (le garcon qui Mary met a le weekend), and Max’s friend...we then all walked to meet Tatiana et her friend a la cinema...we all qued to see the film “ch’tis”...I really surprised myself, cause I actually understood most of it! It was absolutely hilarious! –I think Chris picked the wrong place to sit, (in between Tatiana et moi), parce que I don’t think either of us stopped laughing the whole way through!! (poor Chris(toff)!!!!)

So....Tuesday...salut! We all met a la art school quite early for a crit avec the second years. None of us had had time to have breakfast so we decided it would be a bonne idea to go to a sushi restaurant for lunch...(as you do)...it was sooooooooooooo good!!! All the waiters thought I was Spanish, (I didn’t realise the Spanish spoke a French/English mix!!??) Anyway...Hannah et lizz went off pour using the internet...Mary et moi looked around a couple of new shops...and decided to go home, as it was chucking it down. Liz joined us a peu later, and i made them some coffee...They left and Chris arrived shortly after...the plan was to meet everyone at boite a biere, as a guy called Michael was leaving for the south...This would be the first evening i have gone out on my own with just the frenchies!! Anyway...Pierre and some others are here! Turns out Michael is the waiter from the Irish pub!! WHAT a coincidence!! Soon, everyone is here...and we spend the evening singing, playing pool and avoiding Cederic, (the guy who Chris stripes, mary, Liz et moi met in the second week!!) –who happens to be more than a little bit strange...apparently, he doesn’t know anyone...he just wonders around the pub nearly everyday of the week chatting to random people. Hummmm....so...the night ends with Chris pretending to give Michael un pipe pour le sake of the camera, and Michael pulling his trousers down displaying what can only be described as the dark side of the moon!!!

Wednesday... I am slightly ashamed to say I did absolutely rien déjà....I cleaned the flat a little, (aka. Picked last nights clothes off of the floor and scraped the cement mix, otherwise known as rice, off of the pan. Yum. Alors...Mary text me and said that Kevin was having a party and would we like to go...in all honesty it was one of the last things I wanted to do...watching a film and going to bed early had actually been le plan...but hey...on y va...donc...Kevin asked us to bring some drink...we turned up with beers...a bottle of wine...coke, (cola), and a very large bottle of rum...Liz, mary et moi arrive chez Kevin’s at about eleven...everyone has been drinking since about 8pm...So we feel English and sober...after kissing everyone twice in the room, (about two hours later) we sit down and make some drinks! Liz and Mary run home to get the guitar, and I entertain Tatu, (Simons friend), by singing...(on demand I add!!) by faux pas, I find the room goes silent as I’m singing Peggy lee’s ‘fever’...slightly embarrassing...anyhow...I spend the next half an hour performing different songs for my rather increasingly drunk French audience. Lizz et Mary return and we all sing wagon wheel. (oh...we’ve changed our name to le laundrettes...catchy eh!!??) donc...Simon moi, et others take to the dance floor, aka. Kevin’s alcohol soaked floorboards) and dance to swing music. What. A. Laugh. Simon et Kev go out for some more champagne...(the rum is nearly gone), and Lizz, tatu, donna, (one of the punk lesbians) et moi, end up singing ‘Claire de la Lune’ in the kitchen...I learn a new way to say ‘cheers’... a la tete, au cul, au cul et que ca frotte. By 2.30am, we’ve invented a new type of swing dance where the guys take it in turns to swing their partner, and catches whoever may be falling over. By now, the rum is gone and we end the night singing frère Jacques. Oh dear.

So....Thursday....i spend the morning drinking copious amounts of water.....head to Flunch for some hard core veg. (yes, including chips!!!-however....id like to add these are le first chips I’ve had since I go here!! soo...yeah...) I met up with Chris (Toff) and we had Flunch together. Lunch finished...a new mission of finding credit for my phone began...We got stopped by a Rasta man who said he had invented the new type of music....promoting peace via a mix of rap and rock. Hummm....can it be possible?! Anyway...we were stuck chatting with our peace promoter for about five minutes, and then another fifteen minutes when he realised I was English. After retrieving my stick I keep in my mary poppings bag, we beat him off and run to the cathedral for refuge –and to pray for our sins. Aka. “please make this head ache go away”. Anyway...Finish the afternoon watching “full metal Jacket”...wait for it...in French. I think that i now know every French swear word under the sun. Oh...I completely forgot to mention... (Mum, you’re not going to BELIEVE this)...the French don’t name their cats!!! WHAT is that all about?! That’s INSANE!! How do they tell each other apart?! I mean...that’s like having a baby and not naming it. Okay...perhaps I’m being a little over dramatic...but STILL!!! Poor little chats!

Donc...today is Friday...obviously....I meet Liz and Mary at 11am by ‘the fountain’ and we march to the station....we’re off to Paris pour la weekend!!! Donc...we have actually booked a hotel in Saint Denis...the north east of Paris centre...so we arrive a la gare saint lazare and are ambushed by French women in head scarf’s and long skirts thrusting prewritten cards in our faces screaming “SPEAK IIINNNNGLISH”. Ah...non-desole. Anyway...we fight our way on the tubes to saint Denis. After playing the game “follow the tram lines” we look for someone suitable, (aka. Not drunk/tipsy or dead) to ask for directions. We settle for a flower shop, which ironically turns out to be shop for funeral accessories. The lady in there is really nice and directs us to our ‘Hotel’...we walk for about another tens mins and find our ‘hotel’...apparently, there was a typo error on the internet site...they needed an ‘s’ somewhere in that ‘hotel’. No wonder it was only ten Euros a night (we all shared le meme room!) Anyhow...the room stank of stale cigarettes...so I lit up a joss stick in a blue peter moment of ‘heres on I prepared earlier’. Oh yes. Anyway...we get changed and head back into the city to meet Mary’s friend Laura et Jenny Anyway...we make our way over to la louve...I haven’t been to the loo in about three days now so I’m starting to look a little pregnant...donc we find a good place to sit inside the museum...er..the floor and have an in depth conversation about what type of adults one could expect to be sitting on the floor...it takes us a good half an hour to realise that we ARE in fact adults AND are sitting on the floor....perhaps making the whole conversation pointless. Anyhow...Laura arrives and we head, (and I waddle), towards the Mona Lisa. I swear that smile was mocking me...a painting doesn’t need to go to the toilet. Alors. We find a nice looking japonas restaurant and are practically dragged in by the owner. The meal is amazing...but my baby has gained a few pounds. We walk/run through Saint Denis ready to hit the ground at the sound of gun fire. Seriously...S.C.A.R.Y!!!! We arrive at the hostel at about 1.30am and are confronted by a scary looking man in a leather jacket, (probably hiding his 44 magnum) and a German Sheppard, (dog)...security. We get into our rooms and hop into bed...good(??)night. I can’t believe the French don’t name their cats!

Ok...let Saturday commence...we arrive in the city centre and walk to the Eiffel tower...the girls have never climbed it before so they are quite excited, (in the English sense). Donc...we sit in the gardens pretending to be French, trying to guess what nationality other people are...and decide on what we shall call my baby when she finally arrives. Yes...it’s a girl. And then que for about a million years...we have to take the lift up...as the stairs are barricaded off. Anyway...we take loads of pictures and witness a man proposing to his now wife. (She said yes). And walked all the way down to the bottom. We took a coffee on le champs d’elysee and decided to go to the cinema to see 10 000bc. Turns out its in English...anyway...its okay...although the endings too ‘nice’ for my liking...a woman gets shot in the back with an arrow...she should die...right?? Anyway...she comes back to life to be reunited with her lover, as they are destined to be together until they die some 50 years later....probably through being eaten by a giant polar bear...or trampled on by four legged demons. Anyway...we catch a tube to Saint Denis...Mary exclaims “Shite...we forgot the laxatives!” a few people look up. Thanks Mary...she tells me not to worry, as no one will understand as we’re in another country. (yes Mary, where the French for laxative is laxitif –which happens to be pronounced more or less the same way...oh...and a masculine word, by the way...) Anyway...we arrive a la Saint Denis...its dark...we get off at the right stop, but walk In the wrong direction. Its raining (nameless) chats and dogs...so we cannot get our oversized tourist maps out...we are desperate...alors we head into the nearest building...MacDonald’s...yes...told you...desperate! Anyway...the girls have something to eat, and I go through the whole battle of being really hungry, but full at the same time. Nice. Anyway...we find a route home...10 mins later we are on the right path...it starts to rain even harder...we start to swim against the current, dodging all the mammoth sized dog turds, dead people and dodgy looking men slowing down in dodgy looking cars. Things couldn’t possibly get any worse...right? Wrong...my bag handles snap...just as a car skids past creating what can only be described as a Bridget Jones moment as the tidal wave crashes over my head...I want to be back in Rouen...We make it back to the hostel, the girls have a hot choc...whilst I rock in the corner wondering what the third ‘bad’ thing will be and when my baby will arrive....

Sssshhhh!! It’s about 1am and I feel the need, the need to pee!! Donc...I tiptoe down the corridor, (don’t you just love communal toilets), I reach the point where the four corridors co-inside and suddenly and man strides passed. He stops and says something to me...I say non, desole...and turn to move. He follows me, I move quickly and he speeds up!! ARGH! I break into a sprint and run into the nearest open door. A toilet. I can hear him waiting outside. EEEEKK! I busy myself by reading the notice on the toilet door...about how and when the toilets are cleaned...in all the five languages...the interior of the toilet is all bright colours and plastic...oh...and automatic...and self cleaning...so when ever you move slightly whilst taking a pee the loo flushes, soap squirts out of the sink and the dryer goes off. There is an ashtray built into the door...so you can pee AND smoke at the same time. (only in France). Anyway...its been about ten mins...I am too scared to pee...but I hear footsteps walking away from the toilet...I get the security number of our room in my head...trois, deux, un...I burst out of le toilet and run down the corridor...not looking behind me..I am aware that someone is approaching...but I open the door and slam it shut...the girls wake up...and I tell them briefly what happens...although they are both still half asleep. Apparently the German Sheppard/security does not protect from the weirdo’s who are actually staying in the hostel. Great.


So...Sunday...the girls both tell me they had strange dreams about me bursting into the room after being followed...not a dream girls. Anyway...we are out of the hostel by midday...good riddance. Donc...we catch the tube outta Saint Denis to meet Laura and Jenny at Piggal station to go to have a coffee at the Amilee cafe. We laugh at all the sex shops...contemplate buying the local Sunday newspaper, which came (HA) with a free vibrator, of course....Hummm...think ill just stick with my Hot choc and baby inducing medicine from one of the millions of pharmacies. Tasty. By now, I am actually sick of Paris, and just want to be back at Rouen. We catch our train and I spend about an hour reading ‘p.s. I love you’ aloud to Mary, and our entire carriage. Although they weren’t smiling, I know they all appreciated it...that’ll teach ‘em for not naming their cats...Anyway...it’s good to be home!

week four!!! (ARGH!!!)

I really can’t believe I’m writing this post for week four! The time has gone sooooo quickly here!! donc...Monday...today....I actually did LOADS of work...i started an abstract type piece....took progress photo’s all the way through...and i think i prefere the photo’s...hummm...so anyway...met Chris (Toff), and we went shopping for some food to make dinner...Curry in the end...yummm...I wish I could have recorded the Kitchen scene...alors...picture this...French homme...the French, en general are pretty good cooks...so...imagine French man almost ripping his hair out cause English girl (moi), doesn’t add salt to the rice...AND almost lets a rice cake touch the extremely poisonous potato peelings!!! Arrrrrrrrrgh!!-run pour le hills! Poor Chris (Toff)...thinks ‘my English’ way of cooking may have given him nightmares...he did have seconds though....so can’t have been that bad...

Hello (Ruby) Tuesday! Donc....i caught up with some crit work déjà...i met Mary a la Flunch and we surfed the net (totally awesome, dude), and walked around lingerie shops...laughing at the stupid prices and trying on Chanelle bras. Just because...suffices to say...we didn’t actually buy anything! Ermm....yes...so Mary, Lizzzzzzzzzzzziiiii and i went for a curry...was rather tasty, i must say...I swear that there must be a secret way to ask for tap water...it almost certainly doesn’t include making tap twisting notion with your hands, (easily to be mistaken for twisting the cap of off bottled water), and making strange whooshing noises...hummm...when in doubt...anyway...Indian tonic water is niche zer gut at all. Anyway...the meal went rather well...we finished all the food and Mary didn’t spill or break any glasses...result! Après the meal we walked to boite a beire...our favourite Bar in town...Chris (stripes-not gorgeous Chris with sexy smile), and Tatiana was there playing pool...we ordered our beers and had a couple of games with them...Tatiana and i won! (YEY)...Pierre and Kevin turned up...so there was quite a crowd of us...we headed off early around 1.30am ish (!!!) Good night, methinks! So long, farewell, avidos et Bon nuit!

So....art school again today...sat in Mary et liiiiiiizzziiii’s studio...did lots of crit reading and ate lots of nuts...yum...in fact, too many nuts, i think....can you die from eating too many nuts? Maybe. Anyway...too many nuts are not good. Enough said. Alors...met Monsieur sexy smile... (Oui, oui...je Sais...AGAIN!!) he made himself some sort of Chicken/mushroom thing; i had a banana and more nuts... We watched chat noir et chat blanc, a slightly strange, but very funny film...kinda reminded me of Borat...was good though!! C’est touts!

So...late start today...think I’ve given up sleep as well as Chocolate and Cheese...OH YESSSSS...je forgot to tell you I gave up choc and Cheese when I arrived here!! The cold turkey was awful, but I recognized that I was choceese-aholic and that i had a serious problem which needed addressing...do you know, they have GRAND baby bells here...oui, c’est vrai. I don’t think its healthy to eat a whole big one (!) in one go...hummm...donc... i have resisted temptation for a month maintennant. OH yes!!! –come to think of it...i think ive replaced the whole cheese/choc addiction avec French nuts...they just seem to taste a whole lot better here...probably cause everything has extra salt on it. Anyway...back to what i actually did today- thursday, don’t you know... Lizz text me...apparently some gals at the art school had invited us out ce soir...to a punk gig!!! YEY!!! –girls at the art school wanted to befriend us with no ‘Hamid’ characters in sight! Finalement!!!

Okay...no such luck...turns out “overly friendly girls” are hardcore punk lesbians. Only in france...eh?!---we are defiantly NOT in Rome, and we sharnt be doing any Romans or French lesbians...thank you very much. Donc...we watch a German band perform (all blokes), dressed up in very small Disney costumes with red fishnet tights.... (I’ve seen a whole new side to snow white and her two dwarfs). –Eeeew!

Bonjour Friday!!! Nearly le weekend! So enthousiaste! Went to Mary’s armed with Mango, figs and (yes, you’ve guessed it), more nuts! A turn out the mango is manky...so...nuts it is then...oh...(although you may question my train of thought here, ) but one thing I’ve decided, is the only thing that’s better in England, (a mon avis), is the toilets. Seriously...I don’t think I’ve actually had a comfy visit to any toilet depuis ive been here...as you may remember, mines broken...you’ll be pleased to hear ive perfected the art, (cause it IS an art), of balancing on my toilet...its like this...brace your hands on the wall opposite, slowly lower...lean forward, resting your head between your hands against the wall, (making a strong triangle shape), keeping your thighs tense ready for sudden seat sliding motions, as in the toilet seat moving, not any bowel movements ...yer...anyway... Voila. Donc... toilet yoga... anyway...enough of that. went to internet cafe to type up emails/blog...We have just all had home made milkshakes with a touch of froth... HAHAHA!!! O.k. not funny...Anyway...ended the day with Hannah, Mary and Lizz coming to mine...i made them (unsalted) thai rice, chilli and sweet sauce mixed with (unsalted) veg on a bed of (unsalted) seaweed! YUMMMM!! –who says the English can’t cook!!

Saturday!!!! Alllllllllllllllllright! Read the twenty five pages worth of text Shaun sent me today...and caught up with work en general. Met Mary at 19heures pour going to Flunch to try to talk to mum...the internet wifi system was down. (Slightly annoying). Lizz had left her phone at the internet cafe so we couldn’t contact her...I came up with the marvellous idea of going to her flat and ambushing her and some going out clothes, smuggle her back to mine to drink wine and go out dancing. One problem... as Lizz didn’t have her phone, we wouldn’t be able to ring her to get her to come and open the security gate to actually get to her flat. Hummm...We decided to walk there anyway and sing songs from Sweeney Todd until she heard us...we got lost on the way there...and finally made it to the big gate...which was UNLOCKED! Murky buckets!!!...Lizz was absolutely delighted to see us, bien sur...And we were soon all walking to mine. Alors, before we had drunk even a drop of wine, we started to dress up in different styles...80’s first...chavs, (Vicky pollard styli), cone heads and finally princess layer...hilarious...oh yes...it gets better...I came up with the brilliant idea of us all dressing up like Goths, (just for a laugh like,) with lots of black makeup, (think Amy winehouse gone spaz). Bonne idea...anyway...got loadsa funny photos...we left the house at about 1.30am ish, and headed to emporium; club/bar opposite mine. I got mjoito avec florescent sticks (yey!!!)...the girls; rum et coke. We found a table...some how I managed to break my florescent stick thing, and flick the content all over the bar tender and surrounding floor and wall, whilst Lizz decided to pour her drink in my lap. It was actually rather funny. Anyway...we headed out as vite as possible...its a good job I managed to wangle tickets to a ticket only members club off the bar tender before we decided to re-decorate the place. Donc...Kiosque night club...we’re queuing for about 15 mins, in the freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezing froid...not good. We are dancing for about 5 mins, before we are attacked by French Asians. Yes. Of the ‘Hamid’ type. AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGH...run away. (Monty Python styly) So...eventually, Mary finds a nice guy, ‘Maxim’ to er...danse avec...and Lizzzziii and i have to pretend to be lesbians, (punk rock/Amy winehouse styly) to ward off all Hamids!! Nightmare. We are NOT going back to that club! NO. WAY. Donc...i get in about 5am ish, and go to bed.

Sunday...end of the week...its going so quickly...i really don’t want it to be week five. Lizz and Mary swing by my gaff to pick me up in their Mercedes Benz...and we head on down to Flunch still wearing the remains of last nights makeup, (i swear Goths must have some sort of white spirit substance to get rid of the stuff...)...we have le salad...et...i have the first lot of Chips ive had for over a month! YUM! With nonuts!!!(HA!) I manage to talk to mum online via msn...way ta go maman!! I send a picture of Chris/ monsieur yummy and keep forgetting that im on webcam and ma can see my exasperated expressions at the 10 second mic speaker delay! So....we head on back chez moi...and regard ‘sleepy hollow’ in the dark....the girls partier et, je go to the laundrette. I sit there for an hour or so reading ‘p.s.i love you’; riveting I know. Anyone who’s reading this; please send me some decent books to read...preferably something scary, something to get the pulse going a bit, (as there’s no pictures of ‘Gerry’ in this edition of the novel!!) si t’plait!!

week three..(finally!)

Alors....week three....i cant believe i’m writing that already!..its mardi today...have now got my studio space, table and chair at art school!-exciting!!! Yesterday was our first day at the art school..It is not what i expected, and they were much unorganized, but a lady called Christine made the girls some good ol’ British tea, and me liquorice and mint herbal (tea). YUM! We looked about for a bit and then went for some lunch...we discovered that our the restaurant we go to has free unlimited wifi access, so we make our meals and chocolat last a good few hours, (literally!) and catch up avec emails and the like. Last night i cooked a meal for Chris, Toff, (J), Mary et liiiiiiiiizie! Went really good! They had brought some fleurs pour moi, coupled with the wine i brought to Chris last week that we didn’t drink!!! (hehehe). Played cards, guitar et cetera...while Toff corrected my French writing...he also informed me that i made a rather embarrassing mistake when texting him in French. I asked him if he was “excite” about Monday...he wrote back a message, at the end of which he wrote “what do you mean excite” –now....until last night, I have always used the French word “excite” for excited....turns out enthousiaste means excited whilst “excite” means sexually aroused. Hum. Yes....very embarrassing....at least Toff laughed...(and is still talking to me!! J) however...i cringe when i think of all the times i have used “excite” in my everyday French vocabulary...damnit...why don’t they tell you these things at school!!?? Donc...at about 12am we decided to drive up to the cliff point again...the city was just as beautiful as before however Mary et Toff was there too. I climbed down the cliff and found a step to sit on....Toff joined me, and we had an extremely intellectual chat about...ermmm...extremely intellectual topics ;-) ...aka. Most romantic setting dans tout ma vie!

So...today....obviously, went to college and met Patricia....very lovely lady...we then had to sit in front of her third year class and have a little chat with zem...turns out, next week we have to give a discussion about French and English politics...wait for it...in FRENCH. Bring it on! This will be really interesting....so...got my space sorted dans le college now...so just need to make some profound work. Beautiful, (‘Bootiful’). So....meeting Kevin and Simon (finalement) c’est soir, at about 10ish....should be good! -at the Irish pub methinks! Oh.....i am meeting with Toff tomorrow night to see new places!! J je suis tres enthousiaste! (hehehe!!)
Ok....once again I have been really bad and neglected my blog.....donc...Wednesday...had a crit today...lasted two hours with about 20 of us...could understand most things...AND I even spoke...everyone laughed at my accent...but im trying!! Oh yes...met Chris/Toff tonight...we met a la Irish pub and went for a long walk along the river seine. It was beautiful. –just like a film!! There are nine bridges in Rouen but we didn’t walk that far....it got to about 9pm and we decided to go to boite a biere, the beer pub we all love...which happens to be Chris’ favourite too...hummm...anyway...the bar staff actually greeted me with a kiss. (not sutre if this is a good or bad thing...turns out they are also friends of Toff’s so its ok-he doesn’t think I’m an alcoholic...although we do all have a running joke that Mary lives above the sex shop in town. Oh lala!!) Anyway... have a really nice beer called Barbra...it gets to 11pm and we are now rather hungry, (I’m pretty drunk on one beer as I haven’t eaten depuis breakfast!!eeeek!!) donc. I cook some dinner and we teach each other new French/English words...... Ce tout. J
Alors...Thursday...met the girlies a la fountain and we march off to school...we hung around in my studio space doing art, bien sur, and then went to a lecture....i actually fell asleep, for about an hour or so...no offence to the speaker...but I just hadn’t slept for the last 48 hours! French people don’t sleep very much....alors...Thursday night...one of our new art friends rang when Mary an lizz were over...they decided they would like to join us. Alors...20 mins later Abib arrives avec Lauraine et some other guy holding a bottle of whisky. Hummm...interesting. One of my neibours is having a party up in her apartment. (ive never met the girl before), and Abib decides we should invite ourselves to said party. (oh dear.) so...Abibs strange friends starts talking about le coca...asking if we wanted some...Mary and lizz chime, “oui, oui, oui” accompanied with a really enthusiastic nod. It is at this point where i decide to step in....girls...the French word ‘Coca’ is not Coca Cola........yes...Lizz reacts with lightening speed...”ah, non, non, non,”!!! and Mary affirms this by just walking out the room to hide in the toilet. Great. There are druggies in my flat- luckily, they lost interest in the idea of doing drugs and decided we should all go to my neibours party. Donc, we head up the stairs and spend a couple of really random hours with complete strangers...ahh....student life.

Friday...Patricia has arranged for us all to go and help the second years put up and art exhibition...we catch the bus (pour le premier fois), avec Marina and head to the exhibition space...we get back to Rouen and head for one of our cafes pres de la school of fine art, (where le chocolat tastes like powder paint). YUM! Anyway...we get back to mine, finalement. Chris/Toff rings and we decide to go and meet them for a coffee...they troop round to mine and a few mins later we head to a swanky petit cafe for le chocolat...mmmmmmmmmmmm....soon...we are back in my flat, avec the girls, and i paint Mary’s nails, whilst waiting for the roast dinner to cook. We start to watch Edward scissor hands and the girls fall asleep....not overly interesting, je sais. But anyway... good night Rouen!!
Donc...have LOADS to tell you...SO....today is Saturday....went a la flunch...very nice...and then we all trooped to the laundrette...all being Lizz, Mary Hannah and Myself...armed avec copious amounts of washing, French text books and a guitar. We have all decided, the best way to ward off all the ‘Hamid’s’ type is to take over the entire laundrette... climb to the top of the very tallest tumble drier holding up our (clean) union jack thongs...(hum...ok...not quite like that...) We didn’t go as far as to sing ‘Rule Britannia’ but we did line the door with Arial non-bio...(think brick dust, in film ‘Skeleton key’...)...anyway...a guitar can make for a very threatening weapon...

Saturday night....we met with Kevin and Simon who’s mate was doing a comedy act in a pub the other side of the city. It was hilarious. (i think), and we all laughed in all the right places...i hope my laugh wasn’t too English! Yes...apres we walked with the lads to a Cuban bar...two floors underground. Simon brought us all a glass, (yes, glass!!), of rum each....Mary didn’t realise that you were suppose sip from the tumbler and not down it in one so...i was left to sip said drink on my own...Anyway...met a loads of Americans and spoke in French with them. Weird, i know....but i shall say no more...So...the bars starting to close so we head to a club called Kiosk and dance the rest of the morning away till about 5am...at which point we venture to Kevin’s house...sing, play guitar, keyboard, drink le chocolat and arrive back at mine at 7.10am. What.a.night.

So Sunday...end of week three...as you can imagine I slept most of the day...cleaned the house and cooked dinner for Chris dans le soir...we listened to bob Marley, and spoke about the cultural differences between different cultures! Oh..i have a French dictionary now... which has come in handy several times...i think when i return to England i will be able to describe every English word in the dictionary...its actually quite hard to explain what exactly a pole is without knowing the French for it. I now have a note book filled with lots of corrections from the dodgy French messages i have sent and LOADS of doodles...think Pictionary styly! Anyway...roll on week four! (Week FOUR!? Arrrrrgh!!)